so, i'm coming up on the start of my 27th year of life. i decided this warranted a review of my journals. i'm going to let you in on some excerpts.....get ready!!
1996 (9th grade)
-" i really like Daniel a lot. he's 13 and fun to be around."
- the next day--- "i kind of take back what i said yesterday. i like him as a sfriend. i want him to be my friend too. i mean, if he wants to be more than that it's okay too"
Make up your mind Heather!
1997
nothing must have happened that year!
1998
-first official boyfriend....it lasted for about a month!
1999 (11th/12th grade)
- i wrote about meeting with the guidance counselor to see if i could pull of graduating at the end of 11th grade....so i didn't have to start afresh in michigan for senior year.
- went to mozambique over the summer
- participated in swimming in michigan and struggled with starting a new school and my eating habits
2000 (12th grade/freshman year)
- "i'm a new alumni from saline high school. i graduated yesterday afternoon. it was a really boring service, but at least i'm done"
- i mention that "the thong song" was played at prom...classy!
- i talk about my new friend angie
2001 (freshman/sophomore year)
- "unless the Lord builds the house, its builders labor in vein"
- lots of talk about if my major is correct...
- "common sense is not faith and faith is not common sense"
- "just think, God was so smart that he created physics for us to discover" can you tell i loved physics?!?!
- the fall semester was just rough....school was tough, debating med school, emotionally
- overall, my observation is that i began to have a lot deeper and higher thought processes...i don't think there was one comment about a boy!
2002 (soph/junior)
- "as a result of a fear of rejection, i think i have a fear of commitment/making decisions. if i don't make a decision, in essense, i'm chosing rejection for myself and a longer road of uncertainty."
- "Taylor Sounds went to the Ft. Wayne woman's club. they were so gracious. i was blessed immensely"
- i wrote about breaking curfew on the Sounds' trip to the Bahamas. Dr. Rediger wasn't happy!
- i started my job at st.joe's as a nurse's aide. i spoke about my preceptor..."she really demonstrated love of the seemingly unloveable. it is really easy to clean the people with clean bottoms and nonsaggy breasts, but what about the fat, smelly people whose family doesn't visit?" i didn't say it was politically correct!
- "yesterday i found out that something was wrong with my fruit flies....i cried a lot!"
- october 20th, first mention of considering a PA---as a result of crying through I AM SAM
- let's just say december 2002 was the craziest month of relationship issues (both good and bad) in my life
more to come as i keep reading!
birthday reflections:
-19th birthday "i opened mom and dad's package. it's a good thing material posessions aren't supposed to satisfy us!" ---cracks me up!
- 20th b-day--angie had people from the dorm write cards which i got throughout the day. i also talked about disecting my shark!
Sunday, September 27, 2009
Friday, September 25, 2009
weekend recap
well, since it is about time for the next weekend to start, i better talk about last weekend! sorry, this week has been busy. i'm still at work now, but needed a break---all alone at work at 5:30 on a friday is an odd experience. i digress...
last friday morning, i got up at 5:00 and finished loading the car. i backed into the Alford's gate on the way out and then it got stuck. shoot. eventually i make it to the gym and do a quick 40 minute run through of a triathlon...i'm loving the short workouts! i pick up April and we hit the road to Oklahoma.
a couple things happened on the drive:
1. we talked a lot. listened to a lot of music.
2. a 70-80 year old woman turned around right in front of us and started going the wrong way down a one way highway...so scary.
3. we stopped at an old gas station and the bathroom was a cricket graveyard.
4. come to think of it, we stopped at a lot of bathrooms....sorry April!
5. we found a great ice cream place (i'm pretty sure it rivals ivanhoe's) with the cutest waitress
we made it to oklahoma and found the race site and got everything situated. april has a long lost family member in oklahoma city so we stayed with them. we tried to carbo-load at pizza hut...not the best, but also not my choice. when we got back to the house, the dogs had snuck into my bag and eaten my breakfast....a jar of peanut butter and an english muffin!
saturday was supposed to be "a perfect race day". i now believe in the power of jinx. i had dreamed all night about being late...and i almost was late. it was horribly stressful. it then started to downpour....like hurricaine ike and the half marathon last year! i was too wet to get my wetsuit on...ironic, huh? they announced that they weren't sure if we were going to be able to do the bike portion because of flooding. at that moment, you are kind-of relieved and then kind-of upset. goodness, you have exercised so hard for so long!
we end up being able to do it and i hit the water. the swim went pretty well. i got kicked a number of times. i really like fresh water swims vs. salt water. you just don't get as nauseous when there isn't the salt to swallow! someone grabbed my leg and i had to stop and make sure i didn't lose my timing chip. all in all, very pleased with the swim. i cut 5 minutes off my time which is substantial!
transition to the bike went pretty smoothly too....no one talks about the dizziness that results from going from the swim to the bike. i always feel a little like vomiting!
the bike course was tougher because of the rain and a lot more hills than galveston. yes, they weren't horrible, but they were hills. the first half went pretty well. on the whole, i was pushing too much at the beginning so i peetered out a little bit mid-way through. i have a major problem with taking in calories on the bike. you are supposed to do this to get through the run....i only consumed about 250...definitely not enough. all in all, i was pleased with the bike. the course was harder and the conditions were worse and my time was almost exactly the same. that is when i got great hopes for the run.
transition between the bike and run was rough....i literally could not get my shoe off....ridiculous i know! i was thinking i was going to have to have someone cut it off...then i got it!
the run was rough. i definitely didn't have enough calories. the first half was okay...not stellar. it was just frustrating because i had actually been running really well in training and had dropped a lot of time. this was not reflected last saturday. the last 6 miles were so painful. i ended up going about the same pace as in april which was disappointing. overall, i basically dropped the 5 minutes from the swim.
i was initially just so glad to be done, but was disappointed in the outcome. if i had been able to run better, it would have been a great improvement on last time. oh, well!
i just didn't have a lot of focus through the whole thing...i was thinking about patients and then high grade neuroendocrine tumors....how many bugs i was eating...all over the place! i'm sure focus would have helped. also, i didn't mention that this was the national championships of this distance...so there were some amazingly fast people there. it was neat to see, but they certainly left me in the dust!
things to do better next time:
---better nutrition
---more bricks (with longer runs)
---get a triathlon bike (still don't have one)
i think this does mean that there will be a next time....we'll see! by the way, i'm impressed if you made it this far! i'll post some pictures soon.
last friday morning, i got up at 5:00 and finished loading the car. i backed into the Alford's gate on the way out and then it got stuck. shoot. eventually i make it to the gym and do a quick 40 minute run through of a triathlon...i'm loving the short workouts! i pick up April and we hit the road to Oklahoma.
a couple things happened on the drive:
1. we talked a lot. listened to a lot of music.
2. a 70-80 year old woman turned around right in front of us and started going the wrong way down a one way highway...so scary.
3. we stopped at an old gas station and the bathroom was a cricket graveyard.
4. come to think of it, we stopped at a lot of bathrooms....sorry April!
5. we found a great ice cream place (i'm pretty sure it rivals ivanhoe's) with the cutest waitress
we made it to oklahoma and found the race site and got everything situated. april has a long lost family member in oklahoma city so we stayed with them. we tried to carbo-load at pizza hut...not the best, but also not my choice. when we got back to the house, the dogs had snuck into my bag and eaten my breakfast....a jar of peanut butter and an english muffin!
saturday was supposed to be "a perfect race day". i now believe in the power of jinx. i had dreamed all night about being late...and i almost was late. it was horribly stressful. it then started to downpour....like hurricaine ike and the half marathon last year! i was too wet to get my wetsuit on...ironic, huh? they announced that they weren't sure if we were going to be able to do the bike portion because of flooding. at that moment, you are kind-of relieved and then kind-of upset. goodness, you have exercised so hard for so long!
we end up being able to do it and i hit the water. the swim went pretty well. i got kicked a number of times. i really like fresh water swims vs. salt water. you just don't get as nauseous when there isn't the salt to swallow! someone grabbed my leg and i had to stop and make sure i didn't lose my timing chip. all in all, very pleased with the swim. i cut 5 minutes off my time which is substantial!
transition to the bike went pretty smoothly too....no one talks about the dizziness that results from going from the swim to the bike. i always feel a little like vomiting!
the bike course was tougher because of the rain and a lot more hills than galveston. yes, they weren't horrible, but they were hills. the first half went pretty well. on the whole, i was pushing too much at the beginning so i peetered out a little bit mid-way through. i have a major problem with taking in calories on the bike. you are supposed to do this to get through the run....i only consumed about 250...definitely not enough. all in all, i was pleased with the bike. the course was harder and the conditions were worse and my time was almost exactly the same. that is when i got great hopes for the run.
transition between the bike and run was rough....i literally could not get my shoe off....ridiculous i know! i was thinking i was going to have to have someone cut it off...then i got it!
the run was rough. i definitely didn't have enough calories. the first half was okay...not stellar. it was just frustrating because i had actually been running really well in training and had dropped a lot of time. this was not reflected last saturday. the last 6 miles were so painful. i ended up going about the same pace as in april which was disappointing. overall, i basically dropped the 5 minutes from the swim.
i was initially just so glad to be done, but was disappointed in the outcome. if i had been able to run better, it would have been a great improvement on last time. oh, well!
i just didn't have a lot of focus through the whole thing...i was thinking about patients and then high grade neuroendocrine tumors....how many bugs i was eating...all over the place! i'm sure focus would have helped. also, i didn't mention that this was the national championships of this distance...so there were some amazingly fast people there. it was neat to see, but they certainly left me in the dust!
things to do better next time:
---better nutrition
---more bricks (with longer runs)
---get a triathlon bike (still don't have one)
i think this does mean that there will be a next time....we'll see! by the way, i'm impressed if you made it this far! i'll post some pictures soon.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
great article
check this out....such a great article. i promise that i'll write about the triathlon when i get a chance to breathe...
http://www.usatoday.com/sports/baseball/al/tigers/2009-09-22-ernie-harwell-cover_N.htm
http://www.usatoday.com/sports/baseball/al/tigers/2009-09-22-ernie-harwell-cover_N.htm
Thursday, September 17, 2009
T minus 35 hours
i'm hitting the road tomorrow morning and heading toward oklahoma city. i will be driving through a portion of texas that i've never seen....hello dallas!
the half is this saturday. i should be off and swimming by about 7:30. the weather is supposed to be 75 degrees with a chance of rain. it should be nice.
think of me all saturday morning and into the afternoon!
the half is this saturday. i should be off and swimming by about 7:30. the weather is supposed to be 75 degrees with a chance of rain. it should be nice.
think of me all saturday morning and into the afternoon!
Saturday, September 12, 2009
Training Recap
so, my second half ironman of the year is coming up this saturday in oklahoma city. i think i'm more nervous about this one than the first one! my heart rate has been up all week...that that it says much since i consistently have a pretty low resting heart rate. no strokes for me please!
i decided to calculate how far/how much time i have spent training for this one....then multiply it x2 since i pretty much did the training plans back to back. next year i will definitely approach training differently (and do some races closer together). it is odd how your mindset and body changes with this training though. i did a 2 hour workout this morning and it seemed short for a saturday....it is probably because i did a 3.5 hour one last saturday. that is a long time in a bike!
anyhow, here is the breakdown:
---first of all, i have tried to add up all the numbers but i'm sure i messed up so this is definitely an estimate. in parenthesis, i have approximated the total miles/yard breakdown. i estimated a lower speed than average, so it should actually be more total distance (just didn't want to give myself more credit than deserved). i also had days where i exercised more than recommended, but didn't write it down.
SWIM-- 2295 minutes total= 38.25 hours= 114,750 yards (based off 3000 yd/hr)
BIKE-- 3705 minutes total=61.75 hours=1049.75 miles (based on 17 mph)
RUN--2715 minutes total=45.25 hours=407.25 miles (based on 9 minute miles)
in all, at least 1540 miles total to train for 70.3. seems crazy, doesn't it?
i decided to calculate how far/how much time i have spent training for this one....then multiply it x2 since i pretty much did the training plans back to back. next year i will definitely approach training differently (and do some races closer together). it is odd how your mindset and body changes with this training though. i did a 2 hour workout this morning and it seemed short for a saturday....it is probably because i did a 3.5 hour one last saturday. that is a long time in a bike!
anyhow, here is the breakdown:
---first of all, i have tried to add up all the numbers but i'm sure i messed up so this is definitely an estimate. in parenthesis, i have approximated the total miles/yard breakdown. i estimated a lower speed than average, so it should actually be more total distance (just didn't want to give myself more credit than deserved). i also had days where i exercised more than recommended, but didn't write it down.
SWIM-- 2295 minutes total= 38.25 hours= 114,750 yards (based off 3000 yd/hr)
BIKE-- 3705 minutes total=61.75 hours=1049.75 miles (based on 17 mph)
RUN--2715 minutes total=45.25 hours=407.25 miles (based on 9 minute miles)
in all, at least 1540 miles total to train for 70.3. seems crazy, doesn't it?
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Sunday, September 6, 2009
geography!
i loved geography in 9th grade....some people liked the class because the teacher was really cute, but honestly i just really enjoyed the subject. here are some figures for you....
distance from Ann Arbor (mom) to Quito (christy)= around 3500 miles
distance from Omaha (dad) to Quito (christy)= 3000 miles
distance from Ann Arbor (mom) to Omaha (dad)= 692 miles
distance from Omaha to Houston (heather)= 902 miles
i'm currently thinking of a math problem....how many different combinations could we make?
distance from Ann Arbor (mom) to Quito (christy)= around 3500 miles
distance from Omaha (dad) to Quito (christy)= 3000 miles
distance from Ann Arbor (mom) to Omaha (dad)= 692 miles
distance from Omaha to Houston (heather)= 902 miles
i'm currently thinking of a math problem....how many different combinations could we make?
Friday, September 4, 2009
healing
i'm burnt out. yes, i have had a couple 3 day weekends here and there. i haven't taken a week off of work since last thanksgiving. that is way too long.
i go through phases here where i wonder if i'm really helping anyone. i work with pancreatic cancer and unknown primary cancers. they both are difficult to fight and we don't have enough knowledge, effective tools (chemotherapy), or people participating in clinical trials to make a significant impact in the overall survival of patients.
i had a healthy patient just this week that had a very small tumor, we treated him with chemotherapy and radiation. he went to surgery and was found to have metastatic disease that wasn't detectable on scans. a surgery coworker and i lamented on our adequateness to heal people as much as we desired.
that sadness, that comes in waves, brings me to this other patient. she has had a really difficult time with treatment for multiple reasons. she called to say that one of her symptoms had significantly improved since adjusting some medications on tuesday. she then continued to say how blessed MD Anderson was to have me and that i not only have a good command of medical knowledge, but also have a presence with people that is unmatched. (i should also add that she and i didn't hit it off right away). it was so sensitive and complementary. it reminded me of why i can come to work everyday to talk about horribly difficult circumstances. i really believe that i am there to meet people just as they are...to help them understand their diagnosis and then to journey with them through treatment, whatever the overall outcome might be.
as medical providers, i believe that we possess a lot of power. power to heal (in some cases). power to provide hope even in a seemingly hopeless situation. regardless of their medical ailments, we can listen to their life stories. we can break bad news with deep compassion and caring. we can celebrate with them with there is a glimmer of good news. i really believe that my job provides emotions on every end of the spectrum...deep joy, earth-shattering grief, raw anger, and limitless anxiety. the best observation is seeing patients find indescribable peace with their cancer.
my job is so emotionally draining, but so amazing!
i go through phases here where i wonder if i'm really helping anyone. i work with pancreatic cancer and unknown primary cancers. they both are difficult to fight and we don't have enough knowledge, effective tools (chemotherapy), or people participating in clinical trials to make a significant impact in the overall survival of patients.
i had a healthy patient just this week that had a very small tumor, we treated him with chemotherapy and radiation. he went to surgery and was found to have metastatic disease that wasn't detectable on scans. a surgery coworker and i lamented on our adequateness to heal people as much as we desired.
that sadness, that comes in waves, brings me to this other patient. she has had a really difficult time with treatment for multiple reasons. she called to say that one of her symptoms had significantly improved since adjusting some medications on tuesday. she then continued to say how blessed MD Anderson was to have me and that i not only have a good command of medical knowledge, but also have a presence with people that is unmatched. (i should also add that she and i didn't hit it off right away). it was so sensitive and complementary. it reminded me of why i can come to work everyday to talk about horribly difficult circumstances. i really believe that i am there to meet people just as they are...to help them understand their diagnosis and then to journey with them through treatment, whatever the overall outcome might be.
as medical providers, i believe that we possess a lot of power. power to heal (in some cases). power to provide hope even in a seemingly hopeless situation. regardless of their medical ailments, we can listen to their life stories. we can break bad news with deep compassion and caring. we can celebrate with them with there is a glimmer of good news. i really believe that my job provides emotions on every end of the spectrum...deep joy, earth-shattering grief, raw anger, and limitless anxiety. the best observation is seeing patients find indescribable peace with their cancer.
my job is so emotionally draining, but so amazing!
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
the perfect storm
i have declared september, the perfect storm. everything is aligning together. first, i'm covering a coworker's maternity leave. i'm glad to do it, but the combination workload is a lot. i'm putting in a lot of extra hours just to keep my patients happy.
it is also my month "on" for the free clinic, so every tuesday night i'm working extra clinic hours with an underserved population. i also have someone shadowing me those days...i love teaching, but it definitely takes time.
masters of public health classes started on monday too. i don't have the books yet....not that i would have taken the time to open them yet anyhow! i do hope they come tomorrow though!
i have another half ironman coming up 2 weeks from saturday...training has to keep going until then and there isn't too much flexibility.
anyhow, i'm glad i'm a go-getter....i just wish i didn't dream about all this stuff at night too!
it is also my month "on" for the free clinic, so every tuesday night i'm working extra clinic hours with an underserved population. i also have someone shadowing me those days...i love teaching, but it definitely takes time.
masters of public health classes started on monday too. i don't have the books yet....not that i would have taken the time to open them yet anyhow! i do hope they come tomorrow though!
i have another half ironman coming up 2 weeks from saturday...training has to keep going until then and there isn't too much flexibility.
anyhow, i'm glad i'm a go-getter....i just wish i didn't dream about all this stuff at night too!
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